this isn't going to be one of those "it's not you, it's me" type speeches... I mean to an extent, it's me; but it's also you. I knew this was a bad idea... I'm sorry this is the way it has to be, but quite honestly, I think it's for the best.

I'm not sure why, but lately I've been feeling really lost. I thought I finally had everything figured out, my life was making sense, things were falling into place. Then, somehow, out of nowhere, I feel like everything is falling apart instead of coming together. I really don't know what's going on. I feel lost, I feel like I'm not in control, I feel sad, and I really don't know why. I have no motivation to do anything, I'd rather just sleep or stay in. I miss certainty, I miss being happy, I miss a lot of things. I feel like every time I take a step forward, I'm put two steps back. I don't really know who I am anymore, but I don't think I like what I'm turning into. I'm trying to stop it, but I feel like I'm failing. I'm losing every battle, I'm losing myself. I want to change, I'm trying to change. I want to make sense of things again. I really hope things start to turn around.